New Year, No Promotion? 4 Little Secrets for Bouncing Back

Happy 2013!

In the spirit of New Years blog posts, I began thinking about the New Year in 2013 compared to last year’s in 2012.  I was feeling pretty low this time last year.  I had changed jobs in 2011, worked incredibly hard at my new job and emerged as a star within both the department and general young talent at the company.  I was the go-to person in HR, and built a reputation for getting things accomplished on time, on budget, and with a high level of quality.  When organizational leaders had HR needs, they wanted to work with me.  I knew the opportunity for a promotion would be coming due to organizational growth, and executed each day with the achievement of that promotion in mind.  To be frank, I busted my butt trying to prove myself.  The holiday season arrived, and my boss pulled me into her office a couple days before Christmas.  I wasn't expecting anything in particular that day, but was informed that the promotion had been given to a colleague of mine. 

I was devastated.  I had taken a significant pay cut when I took the opportunity with that company.  I did it because I wanted to work in technology, and I was confident I could prove myself worthy of a promotion.  I felt I had done exactly that, which made the decision look and feel unjustified.  I equate the feeling to running and pushing up to the top of a mountain, only to emerge at the top of the crest and realize that it was not the top, but rather just partway up a much larger hill.  Runners call this a “false plateau” and it’s a deflating feeling.  My colleagues and even my boss told me that my overall performance was better than the individual who received the promotion - so why didn't I get the job? 

With more than a year to ponder this question, and with some honest feedback from my manager, I realized that I had more work to do.  For me, the skill I needed to obtain that promotion (that I lacked) was the ability to nurture.  I set small goals over the last year to improve this quality, and tried to mimic others who are good at nurturing.  I am steps ahead of where I used to be in this aspect, and others have taken notice of my efforts and improvement.   I was later considered for other (even larger) promotion opportunities at that company, but I ultimately made the decision to relocate, and found a new opportunity that many people including me consider to be a dream job.  Everything worked out, just like I kept telling myself it would. 

I’m not the first person to encounter a challenge like this in my professional career, and I won’t be the last.  If you or someone you know has recently been overlooked for a promotion, I have 4 recommendations based on my personal experience and perseverance.

1. Make sure you’re focusing on the right things.  I was focused on being a strategic planner and executor, because I thought that was most important for the role I wanted.  In reality, I was already good at those things, which made it easier for me to continue getting better at them.  With the benefit of hindsight, I should have been focused on improving my nurturing capabilities.  I should have had a discussion with my manager to determine that this was a deal breaker quality, and that she felt I lacked it.  I was in the dark as to what to focus on, and can only blame myself for not knowing better.  If you are not getting feedback, solicit it.
2. Get a coach.  Coaches can keep us focused on what is important, particularly in difficult times.  Coaches can keep us disciplined and hold us accountable to our plan – and a good one will give you a honest assessment of where you stand.  I personally struggle to set up formal mentors or coaches because I feel it undermines what I’m really trying to get out of the relationship.  I prefer relationships where I can have a conversation with someone about these topics, and there’s no expectation that this is a mentoring relationship where the person is supposed to give me advice as a mentor would.  I get the advice as a “friend” and feel it’s more genuine that way.  Whatever works for you, don’t overlook the benefits of having a coach in your life.
3. Set your sights on interim milestones on the way to your goal.  It’s important to be aware of where you stand today, and what your ultimate goals are in the future.  But don’t fixate on either of these things because they won’t help you move forward in a way that’s most productive.  While focusing on the end result or goal, choose smaller, more visible milestones.  I recommend looking in the 3-6 month range initially.  Achieving goals is more about behavior than knowledge, and having a few wins (even if they’re small) every couple of months will keep you motivated to get where you ultimately want to go.
4. Start moving!  Achievers don’t wait long to get started again after stumbling.  It’s important to regroup, but be sure not to dwell on the negative.  Develop an action plan – this will help more than anything to make sure you don’t get stuck.  Once you have an action plan, get going on it.  That is what great professionals do.

Inspired by Daniel Shapero's LinkedIn blog.